It's Complicated

I have a question that has been lingering over my mind for quite some time.  I am not sure if I would be able to put it in the right words, but a man gotta try, right?

Do you think that there should be any kind of restrictions on married couples when they go out with their friend of the opposite sex? or to put it more aptly would you have a problem with your wife/husband going out with an opposite sex friend for outings like movie, party, etc. more than once?  Does that amounts to infidelity even though the relationship between them is of “friends”?

I may sound naïve when I put that out, but I do believe most of the people don’t know how to handle these issues.  In a way I am trying to find an answer and a solution too perhaps…

My friend hangs out at times with a married friend of his for movies or simply hanging out.  I asked my friend if her husband knows and he replied in affirmative and I kind of find that weird.  I think anyone would find it suspicious if their partner starts going out with someone else.  I even asked the friend in question if he would be okay with such an arrangement with his future wife and he said no.

 
I can understand the part where one goes out for some work/meeting after long time but when they go out to “enjoy”, do the meaning changes? or is it because we look it in a way that is considered as “immoral”?

 
What are your thoughts on this and how a spouse could handle it in a better way? Would like to hear about it.

 

PS:  On a completely different note, I got a Cherry on Top award from Dreamygal which came as a pleasant surprise :)

Accident: #3

I almost ended up confirming my ticket to hell, which only got cancelled at the last moment with a bit of luck and a presence of mind.

I woke up in the middle of the night when the city was still sleeping and getting ready to report for an early morning shift.  The clock ticked by even as I waited to receive a missed call on my cell that would indicate that the pick up has arrived but it did not happen.  So after some time, I called up the transport supervisor who told me that the car had already left but he would call me back again to confirm it.

I decided to go down and stand on the road just in case the car was yet to arrive.  I got a call saying that the car has already reached but I could not see it, the roads were empty and there was no sound of the engine running that would indicate its presence.  It was only when I turned around and had a look at the car parked a few meters away from me that I realized that the pick up had indeed arrived with the driver sleeping inside the car.

I knocked on the window, which woke up the driver and then I got into front seat of the Indica which seemed a little shorter as the head touched the roof of the car.  I asked the driver if he could drive and he replied affirmatively.  He took his own time before he turned the ignition key and we were ready to go.  Everything was going fine until the driver took a U-turn.

I observed that the car had picked up the speed and then saw in front of us a tempo parked on the road which was small enough for two vehicles to pass through without slowing down.  The speed of the car refused to come down even as the distance between the car and the tempo was getting shorter.  I raised my voice at the driver who had fallen asleep behind the wheels.  My voice brought him back to his senses as he saw what lied ahead.  By then it was too late….

The car ended up hitting the tempo on the corner instead of a head on collision as the driver took a turn and hit the brakes.  The good thing was that I was alive and kicking and not much damage was caused.  This would not have been possible if the lower back door of the tempo which was open and down (covering the open space below it) which the car ended up hitting.  I would have  probably left this world as the level of the tempo stood at crushing my head if there was any impact minus the open lower back door.

On reaching office, the driver asked me not to report the matter, but I had little choice over there.  When others in office came to know about what happened, it was like a skeletons tumbling out of the closet. It seemed that they too had witnessed incidents of drivers falling asleep but it was never that fatal.

What happened the next day was something out of the blue.  I had again called up the transport supervisor who told me that pick-up should be arriving, only later to be called again and told that I would have to come by my own.  As I stood on the road, I saw the same driver waiting for me this time driving a bigger car like Tata Sumo.  It’s anybody’s guess on why the supervisor lied.  Needless to say I hopped on, and this time the driver was fully awake.

P.S.  I don’t blame the drivers for not getting enough sleep and ending up in accidents as they sometimes end up working 12-13hrs with the day/night difference not accounted for.  It’s for the people who handle them need to take care that they don’t end up jeopardizing the lives of other people, but who has the time to look at that.  If a driver did ended up in an accident they would simply shift him to some other place or would make sure that he doesn’t do the pick-up/drop for the same people.  It’s only in extreme cases, would they remove him.

I raised this issue with the management when feedback was being asked for transport improvement, but I only received an individually marked email from my superior appreciating my concern for raising the point.  One can guess what happened after that.

Read the comments from the previous post to the “accident” point and I must say that many people seem to read it wrong.  I did get injured but it was while riding a cycle as a kid.  I hope this clarifies it :).  The above incident is the closet that I have ever got to death.

Tagged: Seven Random Things

The breezy wind in the air brought a tag which landed on my lap send by Rohini. I have to write seven random things and am wondering where to start and what to write. After scratching my head for a long time I decided to write about instances right from birth to now except for the last one.

Here are the seven random things about me:

I When I was born, I was the only boy to be born in the hospital that day and when I was growing up, I was told by the sisterhood clan that I was adopted (that I almost believed) which I later came to know was not the case.

II I had my first crush when I was in fourth grade to a girl two years older than me, it was only later that I realized I had a crush on her. I just kept staring at her foolishly when I saw her for the first time.

III The only time honesty paid when I went to my Hindi teacher and told her that I had received more marks in the answer paper than it accounted for. She then told me to consider it was a “reward” for I have been honest enough to come forward and tell her.

IV During the first day of college, I went and sat next to second year students, made friends. It was only later that I came to know that I was sitting in the wrong class and moved to the right one, before the lecture began.

V I happened to mimicked the managers during one of the shifts as part of the celebrations carried out. The news spread like fire and the managers whom I mimicked asked me for a repeat performance. One of them actually took place in one of the rooms where the manager was conducting interviews and the other in the department with a larger audience. One should have seen the look on my face.

VI As of now I have been involved in three accidents involving cycle, bike and car. Strangely I have ended up getting badly hurt in the cycle accident. In fact I carry the scars. The cause of the accident: Over speeding and failure of brake :)

VII I like to keep in touch with people. I make it a point to stay in touch with them; with whom I share a zeal for life. I don’t understand people staying out of touch with whom they share their happier times. I can never do that. I need people around me.

The tag can be picked by anyone who think they are up for it, are you?