The Parody of Funeral

A few years back, I got a call at home from an ex-colleague informing me about another colleague’s father passing away.  Just a few days back, I had spoken to him when he called me up asking about my blood type.  I was not sure what to do and took the cell phone in my hand.  I was thinking of calling him up but then it struck me what was I going to say to him?

I was at loss of words on what I should say to him?  I finally decided against calling him up and planned to pay a visit to his house with the help of common colleagues.  That did not happen and I was not able to offer my condolences to him (given that we were working in different locations) and I was not sure what I was going to say to him even if we did met or spoke.

This holds true even for today, where I don’t know how to react to the news of passing away of people I know.  Most of the times, I have just kept quite; just made my presence felt and offered support when required.  My problem is that I cannot fake sympathy or tell someone that it happens when the pain of the death of someone close passing away always brings sorrow and cannot be smoothened with words.  All I can do is offer support so that they can get back to their lives.

What amuses me though that an event like a funeral can also end up a place full of mockery!!

I remember this one time, when a family had lost their bread winner and they were going with the process of “Antim Sanskar” (The final rituals followed), when a man to whom the deceased owed money started telling others about it.  By evening the deceased’s family came to know about it and the man even approached them the next day.  I can understand the man worried about getting his money back but couldn’t he have waited for a few days before giving another shock to the family.  Dealing with death itself can be hard at times and to hear such things on the same day can be brutal.

The strangest thing happened when my aunt passed away.  The feast for the Theravi (the thirteenth day after the funeral) was served and I ended up sharing a table with a bunch of strangers.  The food was served and everybody began eating when an old villager complained about the salt in the food.  I was amused by his reaction.  I stared at him for a minute or two which he noticed.  Later his neighbor told him about the relation that I shared with the one who passed away.

Had it been any another occasion, I would not have mind them at all but it happened on a time when a funeral had taken place and that they were having a feast because of it.  I guess it did not help him to know that someone belonging to the deceased family heard it.  I do wonder if following such a tradition is worth it.  Where the people invited sometimes have scant regard for the nature of the event.

Around a year back, I attended a funeral of an elderly.  This time round I observed a few interacting and taking updates from each other.  This of course did not happen in front of the deceased family but then there was a laughter which was loud enough that everyone heard it.  Have people forget their manners on how to behave?

I wonder if a Do’s and Don’t list should be issued so that such people know how to behave at funerals.  Have seen people who made their presence felt not to offer their condolences but because they “had to” due to the societal obligations.

"Unless one is a victim,
they never know what the other goes through"

P.S.:  This post had been lying in the cold storage for more than a year.  I wrote it, discarded it and then it came back to haunt me, time and again.  So I decided to exorcize it by posting it.


On a different note, Shas has awarded me with the Blogger Buddy Award.  Thanks buddy :)

Conserve, Recycle & Discover —Environment

When I read about this contest at BlogAdda in partnership with Pringoo; I knew I had to write on this one. There is a very good reason for which one would have to get to the bottom of the post.

Global warming is taking place and the temperatures is soaring all over the world. Yet very little has been done to address this issue as the countries fail to unite in this challenge against global warming. I guess in the future we might come together; till that happens everyone of us has to find a way to do their bit for the environment. Here are my two cents on it:

Conserve

There are two most important things that a man of today cannot live without. One is electricity and the other is water.

There are so many places in India where power cuts and load shedding are the norm due to shortage of power supply. Life almost comes to a standstill when certain activities cannot be carried out thanks to the power cuts. Hence conserving electricity is of utmost importance. One can do that by making sure that lights, fans, etc. are used only in the room required. Make sure that when a computer is idle; switch off the monitor or put it in a standby mode. Switch to CFL bulbs instead of the ordinary incandescent light bulbs.

If you are wondering how saving power is equivalent to saving the environment, it’s because electricity is generated through a variety of raw materials like coal, gas & nuclear and even includes a small percentage of alternative resources of energy which is then send out through the electrical lines depending on the cities, state’s requirement as storing electricity is an expensive proposition.

So when you start saving electricity the demand of usage of the electrical units comes down and the same saved units can be used to send in places which face power cuts/load shedding thereby leading to less production of raw materials used to generate the same amount of electricity.

Water shortage is another grim reality that is staring at our faces. Make sure that one keeps the tap running only when in use. Also replace the leaking/faulty taps as they waste water. “Boond Boond Se Sagar Banta Hain” (Every drop of water makes the ocean swell). If possible introduce rain water harvesting methods in your buildings, societies as they help to store rain water and use it for various purposes.

Also make sure that one does not uses plastic bag when outside as they are not easy to recycle and takes around 300 years to degrade.

Recycle

One of the ways papers can be reused is to collect the pamphlets, papers, printouts which are printed only on the one side and blank on the other side. One can make a notepad out of it to scribble, maintain a to-do list or any another uses. I have done this and have a stack of my journals made out of this.

There are times when we gave away our old stuff which can still be use to scrap dealers. Instead of doing that; one can use the Freecycle network where items in working conditions are passed on to other users for free who needs them thereby resulting in recycling.

If you are one of the creative minds; you can use the items/objects not in use to create something unique or could simply pass it on to children as an activity exercise to build something out of it.

Discover

E-Recycle: We need to setup centers for safe disposal and recycle of electronic waste as they sometimes contain lead, cadmium, beryllium, mercury, and flame retardants. The number of electronic waste keeps going up as newer technology comes in place and the user chooses to dispose off their old electronics gadgets and not recycle them which are harmful to the environment. Setting up such centers would address these issues.

P.S. The reason for writing this post is because of my friend who lived in a load shedding area; asked us people living in the suburbs of Bombay to make sure that we don’t waste and instead save electricity as they have to face the brunt of it. Hope she is happy with what I have wrote :)

BTW, Dreamygal decided to shower this blog with two more awards, please check out the award section for that.

Mourning

Sitting in the waiting room outside the OT of the hospital; Viren was wondering “Why Adi?” he was going to leave for the US in couple of days.  He did not deserve to end up in an accident like this.  He looked up towards the ceiling and kept praying for his well-being while Keval and Sanket took care of formalities.  For Viren Adi meant a lot more than just a friend they were like brothers.  They grew up together and shared a closed bond.

 
After some time the doctor came out of the OT room and announced “Sorry we could not save him, he had lost lot of blood”  Hearing those words came as a shock to Viren even as Keval and Sanket moved into the room to have a glimpse of their friend’s body.  Viren slowly followed them behind.

“I am not going to cry.  I am not going to cry” he kept saying to himself as he tried to get control of himself and clenched his left fist with all the strength he got.  When he came across Adi’s body lying motionless on the stretcher, he went out of breath; tears filled up his eyes and overflowed across his cheeks.  He could not hold it any longer and cried his heart out.

“You cannot do this do to me.  You cannot die” Viren kept saying as he shook Adi’s body.  Keval and Sanket who watched him mourn got hold of him and took him away.

That night he couldn’t sleep; all he could see was Adi’s laying on his lap, looking at him as blood oozed out of his head.  “Somebody help” he yelled.  “Everything is going to be okay” he said trying to comfort him.  Adi seem to say something but he could not hear.  Viren lowered his head and heard him saying “Tell Mom & Dad that I love them”.  For a moment he could not believed it.  “Nothing is going to happen to you.  You listen to me, nothing is going to happen to you” and all Adi could do was smile….